7 Reasons to Compliment Total Strangers

Hey you! You look great today! Yes, you!

Now'a'days, we live in an increasingly insular society. Anywhere you go, you see people plugged into their phones, e-readers and magazines. Head to the mall or starbucks and you’ll be hard-pressed to find anyone who wants to talk with, look at, or even open the door for you. And that’s totally cool because we do it too!  But the people and activities we love always get prioritized above the general public. Here are some compelling reasons why you should consider reaching out to strangers — not just to speak with them, but to compliment them.

1. You know how great it feels when a stranger compliments YOU.

It's always nice when your aunt or your bestfriend tells you that you have a gorgeous smile, or how that tux makes you look like a stud, or that your smile is contagious.  But, when a COMPLETE stranger takes a second to offer genuine praise to you, it feels wonderful! Can you imagine walking in a mall, and a stranger sees you, stops you, and says "Excuse me, but I couldn't help but notice you have incredible hair! It looks great! Who is your stylist?" Compliments from strangers stick! Consider the power you have to offer that to someone else.

2. The snowball effect is real.

When something happens, it keeps happening. Tune into any gossip column, and as soon as they get wind of something about a celebrity, it snowballs. Soon enough, every magazine is covering that same story, and the story continues. However,  compliments, admiration, and genuine appreciation can snowball, too. You can’t change how the world works with one compliment, but every little bit of positivity can help. 

3. You never know whose crappy day you might change.

Offering a compliment to a stranger is a gift, no matter what. But because you’re reaching out to someone whose background is a total mystery, you never know how powerful your offering might become. That guy whose sweater you complimented? He could’ve been on his way to a big job interview, and your words may have shored his confidence. That girl who you told had great style? She could’ve been feeling like she wasn't good at anything. That boy you said had a great smile? He might have low self esteem. There’s no guarantee, but your act of kindness could be a total day-maker, and for all we know, it could even save a life.

4. Karma is real.

Even if you don’t believe in Karma in the original, reincarnation-related sense of the word, consider this: Those who pour nothing but negativity into the world are unlikely to be rewarded with gobs of love and kindness and success. Giving out compliments opens you up to receiving them. In fact, if you hand one out to a stranger and you might get one back right away.

5. You’d make your grandmother proud.

Being friendly with strangers is becoming an “old world” behavior, which means that it carries an elegance that most people find admirable. If you want to exude sophistication – and know that, somewhere, you gran is beaming at you – offer kind words to a stranger.

6. You might connect with someone totally amazing (or at least find out where she got her stuff).

Compliments are conversation starters! If the girl sitting next to you on the airplane is wearing a pretty bracelet, tell her so. Maybe she made it, or maybe she got it on sale and will tell you where to grab one for yourself. Maybe it’s an heirloom from her grandmother who was the queen of something. Maybe she’s allergic to it, but wants somebody else to have it. Who knows! Compliments are door-openers and can lead to fascinating conversations with marvelous people.

7. Tiny acts of bravery can lead to bigger ones.

You might not feel strong enough to quit your terrible job or chop off all your hair or move to a new city. Not today. But bravery is like a muscle: If you stretch it and build it up, it grows! Speaking with strangers can feel daunting, but if you push yourself to overcome that fear, your overall bravery level will rise. Soon you’ll be going to movies by yourself, taking dance lessons, flirting with ease. And, eventually, leaving behind your awful job and spent city in your bold new ‘do.

WARNING: I don’t advise handing out compliments to just anyone. If someone is giving you a crazy look or simply throws off a scary vibe, then don't do it!  Use good judgment and select your strangers wisely. But once you’ve glimpsed someone who has a marvelously intricate hairstyle or an enviable pair of shoes, and once you’ve decided she/he is a safe bet, take a chance. It could lead to great, great things. For both of you. :)

Socialing--- What Is The Point Of Virtual Relationships? & Are They Wrong?

"Socialing" --- [So-shul-ling]

So… socialing. What is it?

The other night, I was talking over dinner with some friends when an interesting conversation struck. My friend threw out this term he calls “socialing”. Or a “virtual relationship”. The conversation came about because he was frustrated by a girl he is talking to. They snapchat, facebook, text.... and everything. But, she never seems to want to hang out in person. She keeps sending him these mixed signals and he can't be sure why. She flirts the night away with him, but when it comes to actually hanging out, it's like he asked her the UNTHINKABLE. So what exactly is really going on here?

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In this modern society, social media plays a huge part in our every day lives.  And it’s increasingly becoming a large part of our relationships-- including romantic relationships.

Say you were “talking” to somebody you were potentially interested in.  You snapchat, facebook, like eachother’s posts on instagram, text, you name it! But are you dating? One of you might say yes and they other might say no. Namely because you- aren’t- actually- seeing- each-other- in- person.

Now you two TALK like you would be dating. Call each other cute, talk about your days, and so much more. But…without the commitment. No real date has been had. So does that mean it’s not a real relationship even though you talk to each other 24/7 via virtual-reality? Well, if it’s not a relationship, then what is it? And why do you do it? Because frankly, one of you is probably getting very annoyed by the mixed signals.

How far can it go before it is considered a “relationship”? I mean come on, you’re practically doing everything a couple would do except for the fact that you’re not seeing them in person. Why do you want this virtual relationship in the first place? Is it a relationship at all?

Yes.
Yes it's a relationship because you're devoting a large chunk of time for them and are essentially treating them like a partner.  Just because you don't think of it as a relationship because you're not seeing them in person, I would say you're wrong. If you are going to set aside that much of your time and go out of your way to flirt with that person all day, you better dang well consider it a relationship or  at least something of the sort. An F'ed up relationship to say the least, though. You can at LEAST pay them the decency of seeing them in person or go on a date instead of leading them on. ONE of you deserves to actually move on. And if you just want to continue to do this weird-ass social media/ text only thing, here are my predictions as to why you're doing that.

 Now, you might not relate to ALL of these, but you probably can relate to at least one.

Here are some possible reasons for it:

1.   You have commitment issues: Sure, you might find that person attractive, but lets face it. You don’t ACTUALLY want to date them.

2.   You desire attention: You might not want to date them, but you know you like the attention.  If you think I’m wrong because you think it’s not for attention, feel free to reflect on the snapchats you’ve sent him or her recently.

3.   It's convenient for you: You can talk to this person anytime you want without the bother of meeting up with them for a real date.

4.   You're insecure: You’re a cooler person via social media.  You’re less shy, you can edit your pictures, you can look up jokes on the spot….  You’re afraid that the person you are online is much cooler than the person you are in well… person.
5. You're lonely: This one can kind of go hand in hand with wanting attention and being insecure. BUT, because you're talking virtually, this gives you the ability to talk to more than one girl or guy at once. So you're never "lonely", and you're constantly feeling some sort of comfort because you feel as if these people really care.

But, Is it Cheating?

This thought leads to my next question. Is it considered cheating when a person that is in a relationship “socials” with someone else that’s not their significant other? (besides “friends” of course) Do you even talk to your significant other as much as you talk with this other person? 

For example:

If you’re a straight male in a relationship with a girl, where is the line drawn? Are you snapchatting another girl? Texting another girl and calling her cute?  Liking her photos on instagram...? All while you already have a girlfriend? If you are…. Is this cheating? I mean granted,  you haven’t done anything. But just because it’s virtual, doesn’t mean it’s not real. You still said those things to a real person. And just because you’re not planning on seeing her, doesn’t make the situation less real.  Even if you haven’t said anything “bad”, you are well aware that you probably wouldn’t say those same things to a person you would consider “just a friend”. So are they “just a friend” or are you leading them on just because?

Therefore, this question goes for everyone: When is the line drawn when it comes to social media or texting? If you’re in a relationship and you’re doing these things, why do you do it? Do you want attention and compliments from somebody else because you are insecure? Am I simply over-analyzing the idea at hand? Or are you single and talking to another single via social media and text with no intention on actually spending real time with them? What is your reasoning for socialing? Does the other person know that you have no intention of ever dating them? If not, you should probably tell them because though this fun flirt game works now for you, I guarantee it won't always. 

“Socialing” is kind of a strange thing no matter what end of the spectrum a person is on. Single or not,  it's a question to think about. Are you socialing with somebody right now that you don't plan on hanging out in person with? Or are you socialing with someone that is not your girlfriend or boyfriend? 

When is the line drawn? And what is it all for? Well, I hope I answered that for you.

Appreciate Who You Are Now - Change Is Coming

As I was pulling out of my driveway and headed to Florida for a summer internship, I didn't really think that my life was about to drastically change. With my belongings packed, I waved goodbye and left. I never thought that would be my last time living at that house, permanently. Nor did I think I was leaving behind who I was... permanently. 

Photo: Me and my little sister

The Unexpected

Upon leaving this summer, the original plan was to go to Florida for a summer internship, work my butt off, really figure out what I wanted to do with my life, come home, and then go to school in the fall. But, life happened. The internship and the summer part went as expected. It was the not-returning-home part that wasn't expected. Hell, I don't even know when I am going to see my family next most of the time anymore. It was a big decision. A very hard decision nonetheless because I had this idea in my head of how my life was going to be for the next six months. I absolutely had to make a choice (due to many reasons I won't get into.) It was most certainly the RIGHT decision. I had to do what I had to do in order to make things work. I am amazed at how quickly my life is changing, how I am rising up in the media industry, in my career, in other jobs, and so much more! Not to mention, my opinions on SO MUCH have changed. It's so strange to think that only 4 months ago I was the nervous college student going off on an internship, and now I'm the confident (still technically a college student), woman who has her grabbed her career by the horns and is taking off. My life is changing every second and I'm very excited about that! Then, I reflected on who I was just 4 short months ago.

photo: An interview I had with Jake Miller

Miss Who You Were

I've started to miss who I was. Not because I was a better person or anything or liked my life more. But, because times were just different. I worried about different things, I thought different thoughts, my priorities were different, and even my friends were different. I realized that I will never again be the same way that I was right then at that moment. I literally feel like I have aged 5 years in 4 months. The person you are  RIGHT NOW is going to be a different person than you will be in a few months. I can almost guarantee it. Will you even have the same interests? Friends? Opinions?  I didn't really get the time I wanted to enjoy who I was because I thought I would move back after the internship and I would go about life the way I had planned. I "expected" my life to change. But how QUICKLY it changed, how MUCH it changed and the WAY it changed is a different story. I am happy with who I am right now. Very happy. But, I miss who I was, too. I wish I would have appreciated who I was at the moment it was happening. However, I didn't think that things were going to happen this way.

These Are The Good Days

So many times I look back at old photos and think "Those were the good days. I wish I knew that at the time." Well, now is your time to realize it. These are the good days, too. 

As you are reading these words, take a moment to appreciate who you are right now. Who are you friends with? What are your opinions on religion and politics? What is your favorite color? In a few months, maybe even weeks, perhaps even tomorrow... you could think differently. You will never be exactly the same person as the person you are at this moment. It's sort of an overwhelming thought, I know. Appreciate who you are right now, even if you don't necessarily "love" everything about your life or your circumstances. Because one day you will realize that it was all worth while, and you might just wish you had appreciated it more when it was happening. 

Sometimes, you will find yourself in a season of change. You might not even know it's coming, either. I mean heck. I planned on moving back to Michigan and carrying out my plans. But, that's not what happened. I live across the country now, you know? Sometimes I still can't believe it.... change arrives so fast sometimes that you don't even know it's happening until you're staring at yourself in the face and you're unrecognizable. Not in a bad way. In a good way. Appreciate each day as it happens, because life can change in the blink of an eye. These are the good days. 

Why You Need To Make The Most Out Of Your Free-time

What will you do with the time you have left over?
Because honestly, there might not be much time.

This is crazy that I stumbled across this video,really. Well, not really because there are millions of views. But, you get the gyst. I truly was thinking about this today though. The thought "How can I live my life to the fullest?" "How will I spend my free time?"

Probably more than I should, I think about my mortality. I am going to DIE, and I can't do anything about it. Everyone I know and love, including my pets are going to die. It will happen whether I like it or not. So what makes this video even more powerful is the fact that they disect each part of our lives and show our alloted free time, assuming we are going to live however many years. In reality, we don't really know how long we have to live. I could get in a car accident today and die. I could trip going up the stairs tomorrow and die. I could literally just be going about my day and die for what seems like no reason. I could be walking down the street and get hit by a car. Stupid shit. You know? This video got me thinking, how the heck can I make the most of my free time.

It sucks, sorta. That my life seems to be consumed by work or school. And when I finally get home, all I want to do is sleep. But, this video put some things into perspective for me. Free time. Precious, precious free time. Who should I be spending it with? Where am I spending it? And what can I do to make it... better?

Why It's Okay To Be Not-So-Strong Sometimes

Ever since my mom passed away, I have always been told to "be strong". "Be strong for your family, Jessica" "Be strong for your sister" "Be strong for your friends." And I take on that role with pride. I am strong for my family. I am strong in who I am and what I want to accomplish. But no matter how strong I am,  more bad things seem to keep happening. I'm told all of the same things "Just be strong, Jessica. It will pass!" You can make it, Jess! Stay strong!"...  Is it okay for me to ever not be strong? When so much seems to keep happening and happening....am I EVER allowed to take a moment just to relax and think... I am hurting?

"Be strong" such an easy thing to say, but such a hard thing to do when you're feeling broken. 

I feel like many people feel the same way I do. Maybe our situations are completely different. But, I know there are people out there who have been strong for so long that they feel like they don't have a whole lot left. The hardest part about always being the "strong one" is that nobody ever expects to see you weak. Let me guess. You feel guilty if you ever start to cry. If people ask you if anything is wrong you brush it off and say no.You act like superman or super woman because you think I CAN DO THIS. When really, you know you need somebody to be strong for you. But, even if somebody is "strong for you" , you know they don't quite understand. You know they don't understand everything you have been through, so you struggle to listen to the advice they give. So really, you end up just feeling lonely.

So the question remains: am I allowed to not be strong? Even if for a moment? I am going to say yes.

My personal biggest problem is that I bottle up all of my own emotions. I won't tell anybody anything is wrong because I don't like people feeling bad for me. Nor do I like feeling weak. But, what I am starting to realize, is that it IS okay to let your emotions out once in a while. When you have people who ask you if something is wrong, and you know you can trust them.... you should probably tell them what is up. "But people don't understand." This, I get. No, people DON'T understand 100%. Believe it or not, we are all completely different beings that think completely different thoughts with completely different life experiences. It's just how it works!!! You will NEVER find a person that has had the exact same life experience as you. EVER. So if somebody at all offers to talk to you, you should probably just talk to them. It's better to talk to somebody that can relate a little bit than talking to nobody at all. It's good for you. I know, it  really does suck that  nobody will 100% get it. But, you can find some very similar stories. If you can settle for honey-nut toasted oats at the grocery store instead of honey-nut cheerios, you will be just fine. 

  

 DO NOT fear telling a person what is wrong because you are scared it's "trivial". Those problems are just as valid. Everybody has their own level of how much they can handle. Your friend's bad test grade might carry just as much weight to them as your break-up carried for you. It's not about the problems. It's about what a person is capable to deal with.  Contrary to popular belief, and even occasionally my OWN beliefs... crying or venting to somebody isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign you're human. We all hurt once in a while. Even Super Mario needs to go back and get a 1up.

Don't let a situation that is out of your control, control you. I know. Easier said than done. A lot of the things that upset us have to deal with things we couldn't prevent even if we tried. For example, the things that are going on in my life right now are WAY out of my control. I  am not ignoring the situation. However, I AM keeping it in the back of my mind to motivate myself to be successful even more. The situation might be out of my hands, but MY LIFE is in my OWN hands. And I will determine what I make of this. As I said before, you can still feel sorta bad about the situation without letting it control you. It's okay to be upset about those things! Life is 10% what happens to us and 90%  how we deal with it.

Something else will probably happen. What stinks about life is that sometimes it seems like when we're FINALLY done with one crappy thing, another crappy thing happens. It gets exhausting. And sometimes you want to give up. But it's not the end of the world! You're still alive. You're still living. You still have things to smile about,  people to live for and things to experience. Being strong is easier said than done. From the outside looking in, it seems like a great plan. Actually, it IS a great plan. Being strong was the BEST decision I have ever made. It is not easy. And it won't BE easy. And maybe you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel yet. Sometimes I can't either. But, just because we can't see it, doesn't mean it's not there.  Keep working hard, stay strong, and  remember, it's okay to slip up once in a while. Being strong doesn't mean not being human. You are the strong one, remember? We have come this far, but we can cut ourselves a break!

After all, we've earned it. 

We all need saving sometimes. 

The Problem With Social Media

The Problem With Social Media

Everyday, I find myself going onto social media like Facebook or Instagram and seeing a plethora of things. A majority of those things are the GOOD things that are happening to people. Which is AWESOME... in a sense. “Just got a new job!” “Officially studying abroad in Germany!” “ Just got accepted to…” All GREAT things. Now, I am very happy for these people, don’t get me wrong.  Those are awesome things!  But suddenly, a part of me feels inadequate. I think, "man, everybody else's lives are so perfect. They are accomplishing so much. They are going out there and really getting things done! They all seem to know exactly what they are doing and life is just PEACHY. " That’s when I realize... I couldn’t be more incorrect.

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We HAVE to stop comparing our REAL lives to other people’s lives on social media. Come to think of it,  from a social media standpoint, my life must look fricken great. Yes, I posted the last few concerts I have been to and the celebrities I have met. Yes, I have posted beautiful Florida sunrises and my days spent at the beach. Yes, from social media… my life must look practically perfect and problem free.  Funny, because it’s far from it. I’m not going to post about financial difficulties, or family problems. I’m not going to post about the trials, hardships, and the shitstorms that seem to keep knocking me down. Sometimes, even on the worst days of my life, I find myself posting about how great my day is. It’s the strangest thing. And if I do these things… surely other people do too. I know I can’t be the only one who does this.

I often would find myself even putting down the biggest of accomplishments that I’ve made because I compare myself to other people’s lives on social media. “I might have done this awesome thing but man, what Lisa did is SO much better." I’m not so sure why I do this because this is so far from the truth. What your friend did IS awesome, but are you forgetting how awesome the thing was that you did too? An accomplishment is an accomplishment no matter how small. On social media, people might even make their accomplishments out to be something REALLY EXTRAVAGANT AND OVER EXAGGERATED, so don’t feel bad just because you don’t over exaggerate. You are still going out there and getting what you want! You just don’t broadcast it. And if you did, people might be comparing THEIR real lives to your SOCIAL MEDIA life, too.

If everyone posted all the stuff that was actually going on in our lives, the Internet would be a very sad place. We would probably see a lot of divorce, broken homes, financial problems, broken hearts, and so much more. We post the positive because that is how we want others to perceive our lives. As I said, I am in no way saying this is a bad thing because I do it too. But, for this reason ,we cannot compare our lives on social media to the lives of others on social media.  We ALL have a lot of things we are covering up. Remember that your accomplishments are great. And just because somebody doesn’t post about the hard times they are going through, doesn’t mean that their life is perfect either. You know that girl who you follow on Instagram that is super pretty and her life seems perfect? Her grandma just died. Or that guy who wears suits every day and seems to have his crap together? His girlfriend just dumped him and he just lost hundreds in the stock market. Is this making sense? 

Your accomplishments are just as big as other people's,  you're probably going through just as much bullcrap, and just because you don't overexaggerate your greatness, doesn't mean you are not great!

Stop comparing yourself to others on social media. You’re just going to feel depressed for no reason.

Because you, my dear, are awesome. :)

Great Bull Run, Texting and Walking app, and SPACE

3,000 views, 1 dollar, Hundreds of changed lives

Together, we can improve the lives of an entire community.
3,000 views, 1 dollar, hundreds of lives forever changed.

To donate to this amazing cause, click HERE

SnapHack Lets You Save Snapchats... Secretly.

Are you comfortable sending embarrassing or possibly even naughty Snapchats? Well, you shouldn't be. Because the people you have been sending those images to could be using SnapHack. Might want to think twice before sending that picture!

^^^ I do this all the time, so God knows where my pictures will end up.

SnapHack Pro designed by Darren Jones (independent app designer), saves any photo a person sends through Snapchat without the sender's knowledge. So BASICALLY, it defeats the purpose of Snapchat. The catch is that you have to open the images through SnapHack and not Snapchat. Which is really not hard at ALL. Annnnd... it's not free. But if you're realllllly that desperate... I mean he/she was hott, right? 

"I wanted to prove that nothing was 100 percent secure once uploaded to the Internet," Jones told Mashable . He said he wants to point out the "dangers in sending images that you don't want people to see."

Regardless, people can take screenshots of the image on Snapchat ANYWAYS. But, this time, you won't even know they have the image! Which can be a little freaky!

"Ideally Snapchat will just put a system in place to stop people being able to save images in this way or any other," Jones said.

 Jones has already submitted a new version of the app to Apple allows users to send saved Snapchats to other Snapchat users or through email. The updated version should be available soon!

REMEMBER: THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU SNAP!
 Because that picture could end up in the wrong hands...or phone. 

We're Building a Water-Well!!!

Help us improve the quality of life for an entire community!

My little sister and I have decided to team up to raise money to build a well for a community in Ghana. Everyday, people are dying because they don't have access to clean water. Please help us raise this money so we can help change some lives forever!!! Know that even the smallest gift helps and that you will have a hand in improving the quality of life for someone in need. Thank you so much.

To donate, please click HERE :)))

Eminem's daughter, mating season, and a billion dollar online drug black market!

Can you imagine if you found out that your roommate ran a BILLION DOLLAR online drug black market? I can! 

Check out this week's crazy news!

7 Reasons Why You Need to See Gravity

Reasons You Need To See GRAVITY 

Last night, I saw the movie Gravity with a group of friends at a local IMAX theatre. Gravity is an eerie and tense scifi thriller that is masterfully directed and visually stunning.

 With that said, you need to see this movie on the largest screen you possibly can because

1. The special effects were OUT OF THIS WORLD. *dun dun chhh*  I can thank my dad for that one. At one point, Clooney's character literally tells us to sit back and take in the view. When you're staring at the screen, you can't help but feel like you are really hovering above the earth and taking in all of its glory.

2.  Oh, did I mention the movie is only an hour and half? So for all of you impatient movie goers, you're only in there for a whopping 91 minutes. So you can get back to texting your friend. 

3. And for all of my lady- readers, George Clooney is SO HOTT. Just look at him!  Not to mention his use of charm and humor to stay light hearted in a serious situation is so so so sexy. 

4. For all of my manly readers, Sandra Bullock DEFINITELY did her squats for this movie. I mean, for real though, you have to see that thing. 

5. It's money well spent. You need to go that extra mile and watch it in IMAX 3D because it really is that visually impressive. ( And I'm not just talking about Sandra's booty.)

6.  Although some of the distances of satellites and such might be off, astronauts agree that this movie is a great way to "bring their families to space" with them. Therefore, it has been approved by people who have ACTUALLY been to space. THAT IS COOL.

7.  Lastly, according to an article on USA today, James Cameron has called it "the best space film ever done" after seeing it in Venice.  Many others keep chattering about the positive buzz of the movie, and that it's the "perfect combination" of two huge loved stars, plus the massive hook of two people lost in space! Not to mention, USA TODAY critic Claudia Puig gives the film four stars out of four.

To wrap this thing up, GRAVITY is a must-see. It's filled with amazing visuals, sexy people, plausible situations, and it's not too time consuming. Why WOULDN'T you see it? So go ahead, give it a shot!

Watch the trailer! 

Find theaters and showtimes HERE: